Meeting Good Heroes
While driving between engagements on Friday, I was listening to a new-to-me NPR show called LiveWire!. The episode started with an introduction from the host regarding the disillusionment of meeting your heroes. But in this half-glass-full monologue, these hero encounters helped her friends realize that if my celebrity hero is human, and I’m human, I can do anything too.
Being married to a rock star (okay, part of my opinion may be biased–but there are a lot of local Dancing Queen fans), I’ve thought about this concept before. Last summer, they shared the stage with Kelsy Friday (again) and when they started playing, I realized: “Hey, that’s Brownie Mary!” (A band I was a HUGE fan of a few years back.) And when I got to meet her between sets, it was a “yeah, great show” without any of the heart-racing OMG! excitement.
Maybe that’s just part of growing up. But I still see that admiration on the faces of fans who stop us at the hardware store to ask J if he’s “the keyboard player from Dancing Queen”.
However, this past weekend, after arriving at my destination and seeing the great people who I was meeting up with, maybe there’s a bigger angle to consider–instead of trying to make your heroes into friends, make your friends into heroes. And find friends who will do the same for you.
It is no coincidence that there are a lot of famous friends. Tolkien and Lewis, Pratchett and Gaiman, and well, the Bloomsbury Group. A good friend will care about you enough to give you an honest opinion and not just “blow sunshine up your ass”. But having friends who share your interests and can understand the nuances of your craft are priceless. This is what makes me look around and say, “hey, we can do this!”
I know it’s that way for J and our musically inclined friends. When they start talking shop, they have a language that I can’t understand. And afterwards, J is focused and back on the keyboard. And I love hearing him play and re-play the new melody until it’s “right”.
My recommendation to you if you look at your circle and feel that something is missing: find a meet-up group, go to an open mic, search craigslist. That person (or group) is out there looking for you too. (Okay, a little sunshine every now and then isn’t a bad thing either 🙂 )